Sunday, March 22, 2009

Yes, I know, it's been almost 2 weeks since my last entry...

... but life around here has been stressful and when it is so, I turn my brain off at night, so there's nothing left with which to blog. Not to mention reflect.

But I read something on Stand Firm today that got my ire up and while I didn't feel like posting a comment there would be ... fruitful, I'm blogging about it here instead.

To sum up, or, rather, how I read it, is something like this, "Isn't it just awful that women can't stay home and keep house and take care of their children, etc." Somehow the combination of the actual post with the comments made me angry.

Some women (and even a few men of my acquaintance) are perfectly happy to do just this. I am not one of them. I understand it is a privilege of mine not to have to work and I am well aware that I am the best care-giver for my particular brood, because I have had to learn how to do it best, but not because I was especially well suited for the job. Since I (with my husband) made the decision to marry and have children, it is my responsibility to follow through with the associated, well, work. But, as many of you know, I do not have neurotypical children, so I am not really a mother first; I am a household manager and therapist and mothering is something that seems to happen when it's convenient.

My major in college was English literature and there's nothing I like more than reading and discussing something that stretches my brain. I also enjoy standard office work because I find tidying up all kinds of paperwork to be very satisfying. But what I needed to study at university to be prepared for the kind of life I have now was speech therapy with a large dish of ABA on the side. (Cooking probably would have helped, too, but my mother-in-law, bless her, can make a delicious dinner out of a bowl of dirt and she has been very kind to bring me along and teach me a few things.) So I get irritated when someone presumes to tell me mothering and household management should be fulfilling in and of itself. And aren't I so lucky to have this opportunity?

My first response is, well, obscene, so I won't print that. My second would be, "Come and live at my house for a week and then tell me how lucky I am, you idiot."

And, on that note, let me list my 5 things to be thankful for today.

1) It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon, finally, so we played outside, all of us, which the children thoroughly enjoyed, and I finally got some weeding done in my flower bed, which has needed it for weeks. I decided today that time spent weeding is never wasted.

2) We took the children for haircuts yesterday and it went off without a mishap, in spite of the long, long wait time. Alex didn't enjoy it, by any means, but he did sit still for it. Poor lamb, it really upsets him. It's like his hair has nerves in it. God bless the woman who has faithfully cut his hair without complaint for more than a year. We really don't pay her enough.

3) I took my turn in the church nursery this morning during the first service and enjoyed cuddling a variety of tots. Marshall brought the children for second service so I was able to serve without Miranda clinging to my leg. She and I are most happy when we are not in the nursery at the same time.

4) Miranda's new speech therapist started Thursday and she's marvelous! Really, she is that good. However, after 4 sessions of feeding therapy with Miss Lisa, we learned Wednesday that Weisman's Hospital has had to cut 20 positions, which means we will start with a new therapist this Wednesday. It was disapointing, especially since Alex has really cooperative these last two weeks.

5) It's spring so my tulips are coming up and I'm trying to plan a trip to Longwood Gardens with my mother-in-law, something we haven't been able to do together since about 2003. Way too long. If you've forgotten about my trip last spring with my mother, my dear friend Vicky Olson and her mother, see here.

6) Bonus Marshall's father bought a Wii for the grandkids for Christmas and so we've had it for a while and been actually using it for the last few weeks. Strangely enough, the sport which has caught me up in a passion is Tennis. I am really enjoying it, so I'm off to go play a couple of matches.

Foxtrot was particulary good today. Enjoy.

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